The holidays are here and for many that means gifts, gifts and more gifts. One of the best gifts that we can give to someone this holiday season is the gift of being present. Since, the start of the pandemic, almost every facet of our lives has been shifted and taken a toll. Many people loss loved ones due to covid, youth suicide rates increased, synthetic opioid deaths reached record levels, and the lockdown was reported to strained small businesses and relationships.
Many people were and still are in the fight or flight mode, survival mode and what I call living from the root chakra. The root chakra is responsible for our sense of stability, security and grounding. When our foundational living is threatened by multiple and prolonged red chakra triggers like finances, death, food, shelter and health it breeds fear and anxiety. With healthy coping techniques and a support system most of us can waver the storm, but many cannot. Hence, the mental health crisis is real. Like it or not it will affect all of us either directly or indirectly. So how can we help?
By simply giving the best gift of all this holiday season. The gift of being present. Have you ever tried to express your feelings or open up to someone and before you could even make your point; they barge in to offer a solution or worst starts talking about their issues. Maybe, they started looking at their cellphone, preparing dinner, or working on the computer. Any and everything but listening.
Learning to be present for those who matter to us means getting out of our own space and moving into their mind and heart space. It requires us to listen with all of our senses, to hear what's being said and what's not being said. It requires us to be patient enough to refrain from jumping in and completing someone else's thoughts and sentences. This is why we set aside or even schedule a set amount of time, let's say 30 minutes to be fully present. Having a set amount of time, keeps us from being inpatient. It also keeps us mentally sharp because we have already given ourselves a length of time to stay present. Active, heart-filled listening can be taxing even if we are enjoying the time. Being present means being emotionally mature enough to refrain from proving our point of view or becoming defensive with words or body language. Being present for others and especially our youth communicates to them that are loved, someone hears them, someone gets them, they are supported, someone has their back, and they matter.
-Monica Morris, Calm Massage & Bodywork
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